My Butt is on Instagram

Over the past several weeks I've had quite a few former students come to see me and I've been able to find out some interesting information. I have summarized this information as such:

• The 9th grade boys who couldn't wait to get out of the "stupid" middle school and into the real world quickly realized how insignificant a high school boy can be
• The 8th grade kids who complained all last year about how much reading and work I gave them all came back to tell me how easy my class was compared to 9th grade. Last laugh.
• My gifted penis artist from last year is now incarcerated on a variety of offenses, but vandalism wasn't one of them, surprisingly
• One of my girls stayed almost an hour after school telling me about how her and her best friend got in a huge fight about her friend starting to do drugs and now they don't talk.
• One of our punk 9th graders from last year is counting down the days until he can drop out
• A bunch of my boys from last year smoke copious amounts of pot. COPIOUS AMOUNTS. 
• One of my girls from last year who really struggled came down to tell me she's getting an A in Geography this year so far and plans to get an A all year! Awesome!
• One of the boys from last year used to take pictures of me during class, especially when I'd bend over. Allegedly there are photos on Instagram, although I can't confirm that.
• One of my girls told me her parents went through an ugly divorce and now her dad yells at her every night about how much she costs to raise.
• One shy girl, a girl very under-my-radar, at parent teacher conferences said "I brought my mom to meet you because you're my favorite teacher!" Blindsided me in a good and guilty way.

Sometimes I forget with all the extreme perfume/cologne, laziness and cartoon genitalia, that these kids actually do have tough lives. Middle school isn't easy, and neither is figuring out who you are on this crazy planet. Bullying is real. Drugs are dangerous. School is hard. Families can suck.

180 days seems like such a long time. But I already look back at my kids from last year and think "That went by so fast. I had almost no time with you." I'm in this weird position where I love these kids so much, but I only see them for 45 minutes and its 90% academic & behavior. BUT I care so much about their social and emotional well-being and futures. BUT I have no control over it and very little influence on it during the times I see them.

Seeing these old students and recognizing that A. The year flies by. and B. Their lives are so much more than just school, helps give me much needed perspective on what it means to be a teacher and what's really important.

Is the world gonna end if they don't know who Nathaniel Bacon is? No.

But it might if they feel like no one loves or respects them. If they feel like no one believes in them and wants them to succeed.

It's important to me that these kids feel love and respect every day. It's important that they know they can succeed. And it's important that they know finishing high school without doing drugs is walking through a door that will lead to happiness. 

It's also important to me that no more students snap pics of my backside, so I'm increasingly vigilant this year. Snapchatters beware. 

Bullies

I never thought much about bullies. To me, they were oversized kids who punched you and took your lunch money (i.e. cartoons). No one talked much about bullying when I was growing up. We didn't even talk about it that much at Mapleton Junior High.

Sunset Ridge is much more serious about bullying. They have a bully committee, bully text line, the Student Ambassadors and an entire mandatory assembly about cyberbullying.

I posted about this on Facebook/Instagram, but it's still just so heartwarming. A younger new student found a post-it note on her back at the end of the day labeled "Caution: Oversized Load." She was so upset. Just beside herself. She missed her bus and went into the office to call for a ride, when one of the counselors noticed her emotional state and talked to her. She alerted the Student Ambassadors of the situation and they hit the ground running. They began a viral Facebook/text chain alerting students of the story and encouraging them to make a stand.

The next day nearly all the students walked around with post-it notes on their backs labeled "Not in Our School. Stop the Hate." Isn't that just amazing? I was so proud of them.

Also in the news, I'm sure you've seen the story about the girl who was nominated for Homecoming Royalty as a joke (messed up) and instead of dropping out or refusing to participate, she took a stand. She decided to hold her head high and go for it. Local businesses paid for her hair, clothes, shoes, dinner, flowers, etc. People made posters and t-shirts. Fans came from all around to support her. I bawled my eyes out reading that article! I was so touched and proud that people would do the right thing and show this girl how important she was, even just as one simple, unknown girl.



When the post-it note revolution happened at my school, one thing I thought and others also commented was something along the lines of "I hope the kid that put the post-it note on her back feels so stupid and so small." I imagined the bitchy girl who submitted Whitney's name for Homecoming Court as a joke, standing in the bleachers with the sickest feeling in her stomach as she watched the beautiful girl beam to the applause.

It's wrong of me to think that way. While I do hope they recognize their mistakes, it's just reversing the bullying back to the bully. The truth about bullies is that they are bullied, usually by their parents. I can't think of anything more sad than that. Peers are mean, but they are temporary. Parents and families, bad home situations that cause bullies - are forever. So many of my students act out in class because they just need attention. They need it so badly they don't even care if it's negative. It's so sad! So sad. I have shed tears over specific students and will probably continue to do so.

The focus we should have is not necessarily scaring or shaming bullies, but helping them feel loved and welcome as well. They should see all those people rallying around the bullied Homecoming Royalty and think "Wow. They care that much about one person. I bet they'd care for me too."

My brother Mitch has been a great example and has posted his dedication to Rachel's Challenge - stemming from one of the girls who died in Columbine (read more here).

These commitments are awesome, and I am accepting the challenge. This has been on my mind a lot and I know it's a good example I can set for these amazing kids.