Things I'm Terrible At

Including, but not limited to:

• Speaking in church (which we're doing today). I talk too fast and say whatever I feel like. I know. Your worst Sacrament meeting nightmare. 
• Using knives, especially sharp ones
• Washing my face before bed
• Swimming. I blame it on my, ahem, DD drag resistance. Not buoyant. 
• Lipstick
• Singing, but I don't let that stop me. Haters gon hate.
• Fasting. Aren't we all, though?
• Children under 12. I'm bad at children.
• Elderly over 70. I'm also bad at old people. 
• Using hot rollers
• Forgiving 
• Any kind of art or design. I can't make anything look good. 
• Comforting people
• Pushing myself hard in a workout. I jump off that treadmill as soon as I talk myself out of it. sometimes before I'm even inside the gym. 
• Photography, editing, "real" blogging
• Choosing sides in a debate - Liberal v. Conservative Issues, Educational ideologies, NSYNC v. BSB (jk it's totally NSYNC)
• Standing up to people
• Cooking & sometimes baking (i.e. French macarons)
• Training Glen Coco. He's just too cute or I'm just too lazy or both. 
• Running into people I kind of know at Walmart. I always hide and/or pretend to not see them. 
• Pushing my kids when they don't want to be pushed. 
• Buying people presents they actually want

Yikes that list got long fast and I'm only getting started. 

But apparently there are at least 100 of you out there who think I'm not terrible at blogging, so I want to thank you for that. I appreciate your kind, hilarious, insightful comments and of course, your friendship. All my love coming through this post direct to you. 

Love

D

Leading My Students Astray

It's important to me that I am a good example to my students. Sure, I can be mean and sarcastic on my blog (for you guys!) but in real life I try really hard to be a model of good behavior for these kids. I fear that this week I may have failed.

A few girls hung back after class to talk to me. Two of them are my buddies. One girl was just kind of hanging out, putting things away and chatting with us.

"Hey, Mrs. Holdaway? What are your favorite chick flicks? We're having a marathon this weekend!"

"Oh, man. I don't know. I don't LOVE chick flicks... but I'd have to say... Princess Bride. Probably #1 of all time. I like My Best Friend's Wedding. My sister likes How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, so I've seen that one a bunch..."

"Oh yeah we love those!!!"

"What else... I really like 10 Things I Hate About You..."

"What?!!! That movie is so bad!" - random 3rd girl.

I halted immediately and all our eyes flew to her.

"Yeah! I started watching that once and turned it off in like, less than half an hour! It was so bad!" she firmly stated.

I pressed my brain, wondering what terrible things I had overlooked. All I could think of was their dad preventing pre-marital sex with the pregnancy suit. Which I guess is a little scandalous.

"Oh.... well... It was the 90s...." - lamest excuse ever from me.

The other girls looked at her out of the corners of their eyes as they packed up their stuff and thanked me for my suggestions. They all left, leaving me standing alone in my room.

So many of these kids quote R-rated movies, play super violent games and have these dirty little minds. I guess I had forgotten that there are still tender little souls here. Few and far between. But bless their little hearts.

Seriously, though. 10 Things I Hate About You? What are we coming to?

Out of the Mouth of Babes

I know I can't compete with this gem for student-answer entertainment. But I had a good one today.

When explaining the importance of a certain news article, my student wrote:

"People get pissed off at rapists."

In his defense, they do. They totally do.