Resistance is Futile. Pinterest is Inspirational.

Well here it is! I'm at school waiting for my kids to pour into my room for the first time. I love fresh starts. I love setting goals. I love To-Do lists. I've been spending a lot of time on Pinterest, listening to some of my favorite tunes, writing in my journal and making categorized lists of goals, ideas, worries and task items. I found several of these beauties on Pinterest that have stuck with me lately. I suppose this constitutes my list of goals for this school year.

My thoughts yesterday as I thought about meeting all 200 of my new "kids" Monday morning. Love them already. And I want to hold on to that love, rather than get sick of them, because my love for them DOES make a difference.

My thoughts today as I wake up early, meet 200 of my kids, go over my policies 6x in a row and come home with toes numb from pacing in heels all day.

For tomorrow and the next day and the next - when things get hard (TWSS) and I'm tired and sick and feel like I'm never gonna make a difference.

My Motto for this year - gonna pin this by my desk and on my mirror because it's what I want - to be a legend.

The best piece of overall life advice for school year multitasking/type-A/control freak me - leaving my phone in the car and appreciating nature as we camped with our best friends this weekend was a nice reminder of the beauty of just LIVING.

Basically I want to live my life in bold. Be a more tenacious and vivacious teacher. Expect more, do more. Be a more accomplished learner and student in grad school, my job and life in general. Have a life every day outside of school. Be healthier and have balance in my life. Have fun with my job every day! I only have 180 days with these kids and I want each of those to mean something to each of us. 

Alright, Sunset Ridge Middle School. Let's do this.

Just Call Me Amanda Bynes

Mostly just because that's what my life feels like right now. Do you ever feel like literally everything in your life is going fundamentally wrong? Well I do.

And I'm guessing that's how Amanda feels right now. Hang in there girl. You are absolutely crazy, but I really loved All That.

 

If anyone wants to go on a cupcake run, I could really use it. Text me and be amazed at how quickly I can demolish one. 

Six more days people. 

It's a 10 Can Day

I usually measure my days in how many cans of Diet Coke I need to get through it.

"Today was only a 1 can day! It was awesome!"

"Shoot me in the face. 4 can day today."

Today really isn't a 10 can day. But it feels precarious. For the last week I've been feeling a little like I'm barely keeping my head above water.

Not water. Quicksand. Quicksand filled with razor blades. And alligators.

Wow. That got very Tarantino very fast.

Every time I cross something off my big "To-Do List" (I actually have 4 different to-do lists, categorized in Evernote. Thank you Evernote. You keep me sane), I add at least 2 more to it.When I try to relax I feel guilty and when I try to do everything I feel futile.

Between End of Year lesson planning, school check-out, squirrelly excited kids, getting roped into planning half of girls camp, working on a secret surprise for Ed's 50th, required study for my Boston Seminar, research for my 30 page paper, planning for back to back Hawaii and Boston trips, playing on soccer and softball teams,  and staying on top of basics like laundry, dishes and exercise.... HELP.

Is this real life? Is this being an adult? Because it SUCKS.

It's not all bad. I have so many awesome things to look forward to - Mitch's Graduation and State Tournament games. It's getting warmer every day. Memorial Day Weekend (maybe in Sunny St. George?). Lagoon Day. School getting out. A trip to Hawaii. My Boston Seminar.

But today with the cozy rain, my cuddly puppy and a to-do list begging to be abandoned - all I'm doing is fantasizing about laying in bed and leisurely reading something that has nothing to do with school, a Masters program, a book club or girls camp. 

Instead I'm repeating this mantra. As I drink my 10 cans.

Danica is a Time-Traveler

Why am I a Time-Traveler you might ask? Well it's because I was able to rewind 2013 and re-designate TODAY as the first day of the New Year. Pretty impressive, right?

Here's why. Last week was awful. Just bad. For so many reasons, in so many spheres... just.... EW. I'm not a big believer in pity parties, sob stories, Negative Nellies, etc. So I'm not going to air my grievances or be a Downer Danica.

But I'm also a big believer in honesty and not hiding problems or issues. I love when bloggers - you know, the perfect one? The one who always seems gorgeous, put together, crafty, spiritual and amazing? - I love when those bloggers admit to being down on themselves, sad or discouraged.

REALITY.

Anyway. Last week sucked. I had the aforementioned breakdown. Several, really. And I was all kinds of worried for the future.

So I took matters into my own hands and declared today, Monday January 7, the REAL New Years Day. Today is the first week of the year. Today I really focus on my resolutions. Today I am not watching Office reruns in my sweats, sobbing into bowls of popcorn. (Well. Maybe later.)

Thanks to Glen Coco, a CDP with our besties the Findeis' and a blessing from the Beard, I'm feeling so much better and ready to take the bull by the horns. I'm looking at you 2013.

Last week I posted that OUR 2013 goal/resolution/hope was to figure shiz out and have real adult lives by next Christmas.

My personal resolutions are a little more specific.

1. Better Church Attendance/Magnify my Calling. Kind of sucked at that this year. 
2. Yoga, yoga and more yoga. 
3. Be more neat at school and home - which really means that I'm going to try hard to put things AWAY, clean up after myself immediately, and not be cluttered. See ya later, piles of papers, books and magazines!
4. Plan outfits by week. I feel so much better and more put together, not to mention my personal style is way more chic when not thrown together at 6 am in the dark. Yikes.
5. Try new recipes weekly - we used to cook like crazy when we were both home by 5 pm. The Beard's late work schedule has thrown a wrench in those plans and I eat popcorn for dinner about 3 nights a week. Double Yikes

But the biggest one is the best one. Also the most obscure and probs the most difficult. 

 

My biggest resolution is to be kinder, nicer, more empathetic, more caring and more filled with charity. 

Believe it or not, I'm not as mean in real life as I am on this blog.  I'm actually fairly nice. Promise. But it's not my strong point. I'm crazy judgy and a huge snob about meaningless things like grammar and style. And Harry Potter.

I just want to be nicer. So I'm studying charity, love, humility, service, all the good stuff in the scriptures. I'm going to give stuff to every homeless person I see. Seriously. You can hold me to that. I'm going to smile and chat with strangers.  Make goodies for people. Have real meaningful interactions via social media - complimenting, connecting, leaving people feeling happy. 

I started already with a wrong number texter. Best instagram I've ever posted, according to the feedback received.

I just want to leave people feeling better than they did before they saw me. I used to be more like that. These middle school kids and early mornings have slowly crushed my soul. But I'm gonna get it back.

So here's to you 2013! You are now officially allowed to start!

Care-iculum.

It's been an awesome year at Mapleton Junior High. I loved it. I learned so much. I grew. I had a great time. I met some amazing people (adults and otherwise).

As I look back on our year, past the lessons about Islam, WWII, Apartheid, Communism and Immigration, I've found that what I REALLY want them to know was never listed in my state core curriculum.

• Everyone is worth listening to, and we're all a team. 
• You are responsible and are going to be held accountable for everything in your life. Don't drop that ball. You can't cop out.
• The Office is the greatest television show ever made. 
• Clean up after yourselves!
• Self-evaluate. Constantly ask yourself "Why?" "Why am I doing this?" "Why are they doing that?" and really think about the answers. Be aware of what you are doing and why.
• To my girls - Gossip sucks and you can't control what people say about you. But the way you live will give them things to talk about, good or bad. 
• To my boys - SWAG = douchebag.

But the biggest thing I want them to walk away with?

You control your life. You determine your happiness. You build your future.

So stop whining. Stop blaming. Stop giving up on hard things. Stop competing with everyone around you.

Start trying. Start thinking. Start living. Start loving. Start choosing.

Ultimately, I want you to care. About your future. About your present. About your brain. About your heart. About your reputation. About your morals. About your family. About your relationships. About who you are and who you want to be. 

In this society that says it's cool to be apathetic and nonchalant, where you can protect your pride by not trying, I wish you could see how much I believe in you. I wish you could see the amazing things that lie ahead of you if you just have the courage to reach out and try for them. I want you to enjoy the endless benefits that come from standing up and deciding that YOU are going to be happy, no matter what.

I want the best for you. I love you and I'll miss you. Thanks for an amazing year. I wish you many, many more.

Always,



Mrs. Holdaway